Adolescents who abuse drugs often act out, perform poorly in school, drop out of school, and are at risk for violence.²

Parents’ drug abuse often means chaotic, stress-filled homes and child abuse and neglect. Such conditions harm the well-being and development of children in the home and may set the stage for drug abuse in the next generation. When adults abuse drugs, they often have problems thinking clearly, remembering, and paying attention. These adults often develop poor social behaviors as a result of their drug abuse, and their work performance and personal relationships suffer.³

My Story by Cheryl*

I never thought addiction would be a part of my life.  I came from a nice family and wanted to work in finance like my Dad.  When I was in middle school, I ended up at some parties with older teens and the first couple times I saw kids my age drinking and using drugs, I thought, “No way.”  Some of them looked like they were having fun, but mostly they just looked stupid.  It wasn’t until high school that I wanted to know what it was like and started drinking and smoking pot from time to time.  I had it under control.  My little sister, Missy, watched me a lot and I worked hard to hide it from her.  I still made nachos and watched movies with her after school.

Drinking and using drugs went from occasionally on the weekends to every weekend…then my weekends got a lot longer. By the time I was a senior in high school, I was dumping out most of my coffee to pour in liquor and regularly doing drugs in the parking lot. Missy went to a different school than I did so I thought she wouldn’t know what I was doing. I knew she looked up to me and I wasn’t being the best example. I didn’t play softball anymore and I had dropped out of all the activities that I had found so fun so that I could spend my time using. I even skipped the field trip to Wall Street. Most of my longtime friends weren’t interested in drinking and doing drugs the way I was doing, so I found new friends that could hang out with me. Slowly I began to disappear from family events—I skipped birthdays and celebrations and I only showed up to my parents’ anniversary party for half an hour. I felt bad about it, but not enough to change how I was living.

I didn’t go to college like I had planned; I ended up working in a restaurant. I know my parents and Missy were disappointed and they told me I was wasting my potential. I felt bad that I wasn’t living up to anyone’s expectations. I was embarrassing myself all the time—showing up places high, behaving like a real jerk. When Missy graduated from college with honors and went on to get a professional career, I really felt worthless. I was so dishonest with her that she didn’t really want to hang out with me, I was so ashamed of what I was doing I couldn’t tell her. I spent my free time partying or recovering from the night before.

It wasn’t until I was confronted by my family and one remaining real friend about my behavior that I realized that what I was doing definitely was not normal. When I saw the looks on their faces I knew I couldn’t get away with it anymore. “I know you’re in there and I love you,” Missy told me while crying and looking at me like I was one of the worst people she’d ever seen. “I just haven’t seen you in years.” My family told me about all the times my drinking and using affected them and how I had hurt them. A lot of things I thought they didn’t notice—like the time I threw up out the window and into the bushes—they had.

I agreed to go to treatment even though I thought my family was just overreacting. They’d been worried about me for a long time. I was also tired of the lying, the stealing, and the guilt. I hated the way I was living. I learned in treatment about my disease and that I had revolved my life around drugs. I wanted to get better and be free from using. I had to learn new ways to deal because I’d always turned to drugs to check out.

After treatment, I continued seeing a therapist and participating in a recovery program. I abstain from drugs and alcohol and basically changed my whole life. My family is very supportive and provides help I didn’t know I needed. I had to learn how to handle stress, anxiety, and uncomfortable situations in a whole new way. I also rediscovered my old interests, like playing softball. Missy and I go to the movies regularly and catch up. Now I can tell her what’s really going on with me and we have a much better relationship. I’ve gotten lots of practice saying, “No, thanks,” when people offer me a drink or drugs. I’m studying finance in college now. My Dad has even offered to help with some projects.

I can’t say that my life is perfect, but I’m so much happier. People in my life are more important to me than ever and I can show up for them. Missy asked me for advice recently and I was so touched that she wanted it. And no matter what happens, I feel like I can stay sober.

*Cheryl is not a real person, but the facts and circumstances are a composite of several young girls.