Is It Fair?

The idea of fairness may be hard to grasp, so teens can ask themselves, "Am I being selfish?" While a youth may not worry much about what a decision means for him, thinking about how his actions affect others can put the brakes on rash decisions.

Teens also can make better decisions by asking themselves if someone else is being selfish toward them. Friends may ask a teen to show loyalty, love, cool, or courage. But are they really looking for a way to get high, a place to party, a chance to have sex, a free ride based on her work, or someone to blame if things go wrong?

Do I Have To Decide Now?

In an ideal world, teens would not hesitate to do the right thing, avoid harm, and treat others fairly. However, if pressure is great and choices are hard to sort out, teens can decide not to decide. By putting a choice on hold, they can avoid taking a harmful plunge.

After all, most personal decisions are not now-or-never choices. There will be other nights, other parties, other friends, and other ways to blow off steam. Yet once a youth acts, he cannot undo it. He can try to shrug off a bad decision or resolve not to do it again. However, costs such as guilt, shame, loss of friends, property damage, injury, and legal trouble are hard to erase.

Sources

Additional Resources

American Red Cross. Health & Safety Tips: Decision-Making Skills for Young People, last referenced 6/6/06.

Students Against Destructive Decisions, 2004. Teens Today: National Study Links Teens' "Sense of Self" to Alcohol, Drug Use, and Sex, last referenced 6/6/06.

University of Minnesota Extension Service, 2005. Positive Parenting of Teens, last referenced 6/6/06.

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